Well, it could have been worse.
True, I read five subjects from the Conviser yesterday before passing out from jetlag and lack of sleep over Community Property and thought, "that's okay, I'll read it tomorrow." True, the first essay question today was on Community Property. But I had reviewed it a few days ago, and I think I did okay on that one.
True, I totally muffed the second question (and before my loyal commenters chime in with "aw, you probably didn't do that badly," yes, I did; missing the entire remedies component is not good). But by all accounts you can fail every individual written component of the bar and still pass the exam, so hopefully I will actually pass a couple of essays, that will average out to a barely-failing grade for the overall essay component, and I won't be back in February.
Not that I mind being back in California; I have eaten two In-N-Out burgers and one Juanita's burrito, the smog is bad but not intolerable, and I love driving everywhere. But I'd rather not have to shell out the dough to retake this exam, so perhaps it's best if I reimmerse myself in flashcards.
But one note: I know this isn't about me, because we are at different test centers (and because I have it on good authority that I am not dumpy). But I did wear my Harvard Law t-shirt to the exam today, because it makes me feel good. I am proud of my accomplishments, proud of going to HLS, and I felt like I needed every bit of subconscious self-reinforcement possible. It was not some kind of psychological warfare to intimidate other test takers. Lots of people wore their school shirts today, and I am sick of feeling like I need to apologize for wearing mine. (This is the same self-effacing sentiment that makes people say they "go to school in Boston" and I am heartily tired of it. Just say you go to Harvard! Heaven knows you went there chiefly for the purpose of waving the name around, so why chicken out?)
UPDATE: it seems the visible reminder that some people have the "unfair advantage," now amended to read "(job market wise)," of having attended a higher ranked school is sufficiently disturbing to others that we should refrain from anything that could be interpreted as braggadocio during the exam. Setting aside whether or not it's unfair in general for people at more highly ranked schools to more easily obtain employment, and whether such fragile flowers as can have their bar exam confidence shattered by someone else's alma mater should really enter the cutthroat world of law . . . there's always someone better, smarter, or harder working than you. Get used to it. I did.
And apparently the appropriate response to any disagreement with this fashion police nonsense is to turn off comments. This is so tiresome.