So I saw it. And it was good.
I was afraid that I would be, per Belle, one of "the grateful mildly obsessive fans ... who are generally so happy to see some new incarnation of their Most Favorite Thing Ever that they are way too forgiving of the flaws and thus express too much enthusiasm," but it turns out that I am more of a "purist too devoted to The Canon and thus likely to be too critical of any endeavor." Eomer kept noshing on the scenery at every spare moment, but the guy playing Rebooted Kirk was not bad. The fanservice recitation of cliched lines was simultaneously cringeworthy and enjoyable. The pre-credits sequence was an exercise in eyerolling, but I loved the Young Spock interlude (although Winona Ryder's old lady makeup was really distracting---she is only six years older than the actor playing her son! Like there aren't actual age-appropriate actresses who need work?).
And now we get to the heart of my ambivalence: Spock. Constant Readers know that I have a soft spot for Spock. In my long-ago days as an avid consumer of Star Trek fanfic, Spock/Uhura was my preferred het ship. But seeing it play out on the big screen just showed how part of the appeal was the improbable and forbidden nature of said ship! In the grand scheme of canon rape, it was a small thing, considering the wholesale rejiggering of the Trek universe through time travel. But it undermined my enjoyment a bit, as did the almost total annihilation of the most interesting of the Federation's member races. These new factors may eliminate the Amok Time storyline! Does rebooted Spock even have to worry about pon farr? And isn't the logical choice at the end to avoid the false dichotomy, get some Spock gametes, and set about rebuilding the Vulcan race through artificial means? Does anybody else care? Okay, it's just me.
But things get blowed up real good, and Kirk fights lots of baddies, and Leonard Nimoy, looking older than God, passes the torch with wry aplomb. Sulu/Harold is a total badass and that Shaun of the Dead guy does a good Scotty. Go see the movie.