One of my friends works in a legal industry but is not a lawyer. Ever so often he emails me incredulously about crazy things he sees. I am jaded and find them hilarious but not surprising. For example, this deposition transcript he sent, paraphrased to protect the innocent:
Q Did you put on pants today?
A I don't recall.
Q You're wearing pants now, are you not?
A I'm not sure.
Q I'd like you to look at exhibit 1, your pants, which are on your body below your waist.
Q So are you wearing pants.
A It appears that I am.
Q Does this refresh your memory as to whether you put on pants today?
A No. Someone must have put pants on me, but I don't know if it was me.
Q I'd like you to look at exhibit 2. Do you see the part that says "I, Deponent, put on pants today?"
Q And is that your signature?
Q And today's date?
Q Do you remember signing this?
A Not specifically; it appears that I did sign it.
Q Would this not indicate that you put on pants today?
A I wouldn't want to guess what the person who wrote this meant.
Q Do you know who wrote this note?
A I do not recall.